Helping Versus Harming

 Sometimes, the line between helping and harming can be thinner than we realize. It’s easy to think that offering help is always a good thing, but there’s more to it than just good intentions.

When we step in to help someone, our goal is usually to make their life a little easier or to provide support when they need it most. But there are times when what we think is helping could actually cause harm. This can happen when we don’t fully understand the situation, or when we try to fix things in a way that’s more about our needs than the person we’re trying to help.

For example, offering unsolicited advice can sometimes make someone feel like their own thoughts or decisions aren’t valid. Or, doing something for someone that they could do for themselves might undermine their confidence and independence. It’s not that we mean to cause harm, but the impact of our actions can sometimes be different from what we intended.

So how do we ensure we’re really helping? It starts with listening. Before jumping in with solutions, it’s important to understand what the person actually needs or wants. Sometimes, what they need most isn’t a solution at all—it might just be someone to listen, to empathize, or to simply be there.

It’s also helpful to check in with ourselves. Are we offering help because it’s truly in the other person’s best interest, or because it makes us feel good? There’s nothing wrong with feeling good about helping others, but our focus should always be on what’s best for them.

In the end, helping is about empowering others, not taking control. It’s about being there in a way that respects their autonomy and supports their growth. When we approach helping with this mindset, we’re more likely to make a positive difference—and less likely to unintentionally cause harm.